Boundaries and Blogging and Me, Oh MY!

Now I’ve gone and done it. I’ve launched this blog. Oh how I’ve fretted over this. Should I do it? Should I not? I once swore I’d never blog, because, well it’s just such a cliché, I thought. Everyone’s BLOGGING now, just like everyone used to go rollerblading, or channel surfing, or shoplifting – WHATEVER. I didn’t want to go public as just another ego driven “artiste,” turning myself inside out for whatever crumbs of approval would be strewn my way, while in reality, most readers would be begging, Please, go get therapy, and put us out of our misery. I did not want to be THAT girl.

Well, despite the kindhearted souls who have been generous enough to ask for my ID over the last couple of years (much appreciated), the fact is, I am now 50 and can no longer get away with being any kind of girl. I believe I have undeniably earned my place among women, and it’s a bit beneath my newfound status to indulge in the sort of teenaged, angst fueled yearning that has been behind so much of my writing thus far…

Here’s the thing. This medium of blogging… it really has the feel of, well, a diary. An extraordinarily public diary, true, but providing the same experience as scrawling in my 99 cent spiral notebook that I keep tucked in my bedside night table. Again, fulfilling that need to really be HONEST and just speak from the heart. So yes, you can expect me to share all kinds of dirt… on myself of course. Juicy, confessional type stuff. Borderline embarrassing, train wreck type stuff. I promise. To me, boundaries are like dares…

So then the idea is, what is going to be the THEME of my blog? I’m not trying to sell anything. Not yet, anyway… And I’m not getting paid to do this, so I have no one else’s agenda to adhere to, no editorial guidelines to follow. It’s really all about me. (Note: here’s an important clue as to why blogging is so popular – it’s a narcissist’s wet dream…) I thought about framing it in a particular aspect of my experience, or my identity, if you will, for example, my widowhood, or my motherhood, or my neighborhood (past or present) or even my creative and production experience (see linkedin profile for more detailed professional disclosure). But the fact is, none of these categories totally define me, and besides, I need to be free to ramble about old drug stories or sexual exploits.

Along the way, I promise to share interesting and important news about projects I’m involved with, organizations I support, and any other significant campaigns, events, bits of news or cultural offerings that I think are worth repeating. You can expect a mix of heavy and light, serious and frivolous. I won’t bore you with anything that already bores me. And if you’re good, I may even reward you with juicy stories or even erotic poems. (Note: because I’m finally a grown-up, I’m allowed to talk dirty and call it erotic. It’s true.)

And, full disclosure… if enough of you start reading this, I will be able to start charging for ad space and make lots of money off this damn thing… I mean, er, if you really do come to love me (fingers crossed), then maybe I’ll be able to influence the way you think about things that I think are really important. But either way, it’s all gonna be about me, or rather six degrees of me…

I’m so glad you’re here. Hope you stick around for the next installment…

xo

D

Photo by blueblitz